At almost three months into these strange isolated times, I’m finding myself to-ing and fro-ing with where I wish to be, in both mindset and physical space. The past month has seen a distinct decline in home school ettiquette; Sonn’s mood and our productivity in routine has plateaud right at the moment the school’s began offering scheduled video lessons… My subconscious screamed at me somewhere down the line, I began wondering why I was reacting in revolt to being handed help and learning support? I think it’s because, I’d rather energies were directed into the not-so-distant future, where the hint of normality might be able to return? We need a set plan of action to get the kids back to their beloved school-lives (whether they want to admit it or not!), instead of the system suddenly advancing in lonesome, contactfree technologies… It’s great these things are available, Sonn’s been taking part in weekly Zoom meetings with The Cubs, and frequently talks to his teacher over the phone, but that’s no way for an overly-active eight year old to live, and it’s starting to hit home hard.
And with no end in sight, it’s my job, as mother, whilst simultaneously trying-to-get-back-to-work like no time has passed, to pull something out of the bag. It had become apparent to me that Sonny needed a little space to get his own head in a place for productivity, I can’t say we’ve found the right balance, yet, but were motoring on all the same. Focusing on areas of creativity, more than a set pen and paper routine seems to do the trick. We learnt the cup challenge in under an hour while Ivy slept one afternoon, and it was one of the most rewarding achievements of the lockdown show so far. The forementioned Cubs meets’ have been great at maintaining a strong head for the kids, although simple, the Zoom meetings are filled with activities, experiments and FUN- that definitely sways the mood for an hour each week, there’s a sense of determination to strive for, the all-important aim were deeply lacking in quarantine.
Talking to others, and it quickly became apparent, this shared unrested headspace, spreading faster than the virus itself. Widespread, the need for escapism, whilst being cooped up inside. I yearned to get out and about, to look through the lens again, and this is where friendships quickly came in. I’d spoken to Dan throughout lockdown, we’d worked together a number of times throughout the year previous. Corona has erupted right at the crescendo of his last degree term. Along with his peers, and many of my third year and MA friends, he’s seeing the most important part of his course, from the four walls of his home, instead of slap bang in the height of motivation, that last push. I feel for all of these guys, as well as anyone in the education system at present, seemingly in limbo more than the rest of us.
Dan had modeled for me before and lives locally, so became the perfect excuse to get out of the house and shoot. And with no real aim, other than a colour-palette or two, we set out to find a mix between natural space and a concrete backdrop. The first shot captured was a landscape-portrait centralised around Vinegar Pond, over on Mousehold. I’d only learned of it’s name since, and think it’s really cool, like the sound of a meeting place, a backdrop from a cool teen flick from my younger days. Vinegar Pond, with it’s burnt out facade and empty, otherworldly quality expanded upon the closed-eyed expression we went with. I’d watched Devs a few weeks before, and it reminded me of that.
Dan’s background in self-styled modeling works well en route to a photo-walk. We’d often pick out found backdrops, a pop of colour on a garage, industrial emptiness, and a photo-worthy estate screaming with my ongoing study of the beauty in decay, and he’d just step in and get the job done. Jacket on-jacket off? Switching out details here and there, and there’s an instantaneous photo-story built out of a catchup between friends. We must’ve only been shooting for an hour or so, and the final selection is built of 33 images, narrowed down from slightly larger digi-hit rate. I don’t often over-shoot, even with digital, because I think film has reined me in over the years. I can’t tell you how good it felt to see life through the lens again in the outside world. I’ve been building a constant folio of images throughout lockdown, but it’s mainly personal stuff, or family life, wheras a photo-walk offers more of an experience, and a relationship between shooter and sitter.
Looking back, and these are some of my favourite days; off the cuff and spontaneous, and there’s definitely something in the DIY, observational-narrative I often build from a scene. There’s nothing like a spark of energy to re-light the storyteller in me.